Wednesday, 28 December 2011

budak pandai selalu perfectionist..!

post hari ni confirm bukan post yang emo2 mahupun jiwang2 tak tentu pasal..
tapi, ni lah kenyataan!
budak-budak pandai di sekeliling aku semuanya suka benda2 yang PERFECT!
tutorial HARUS 10/10
report HARUS 10/10
experiment HARUS dapat graf yang paling cantik..
percentage error HARUS 0.01%
ambik bacaan HARUS yang paling tepat.
garisan antara dua titik HARUS paling tepat..kalu tidak,
ambil bacaan sekali lagi..
walau masa untuk buat experiment tinggal 1/2 jam lagi...
letih juga pada mulanya untuk aku terima + berhadapan dengan semua ni..
tambah-tambah lagi, setiap minggu ada 3 experiment...

i've never fed up with this bunch of people..
they thought me how to be to be the best.
yup, it's competitive, but through this I will able to discover my capability..
(sound very inspirational, huh?)
don't blame them..
because the are BUDAK PANDAI..
and YES, they are always PERFECTIONIST!


Tuesday, 27 December 2011

i'm totally out of mood!

this couple of weeks maybe is a heaven for certain people..but mine, like hell!
yelah, 2 minggu berturut-turut cuti hari isnin..
dua-dua minggu juga balik...fine.
totally not jealous of them..!
but my case is different..
feel  like very exhausted this week..although baru start kuliah tadi.!
i know, this time my post mostly depressing punya cerita..
(bcoz sblom ni sgt bermotivasi, kn?)
 i just feel frustrated..of not spending enough time with my family last week..
nak balik pon, nasib tak tertinggal train gara2 rushing tak tentu pasal..!

i will get easily sad when my family is unhappy..
*rasa nak nangis suda!
and luckily, blog ni da tak dikunjungi sesiapa..bagus!
another reasons nak tulis apa2 di blog yang berhabukk..
dan mungkin juga sebab hormon yg tak stabil, rasa emo tak kenal tempat dan masa..
rasa down sgt...may i need anybody's shoulder to cry on?
(blah la Fatin)!

enough!!! esok ada test Biology...

"all is fine..# 3Idiots"

Wednesday, 21 December 2011

I am mad at myself..

I am mad at myself..
I am mad at myself of not being the best in everything..
That i have to rely on somebody to be good in anything..
That i have to put myself away..just for being someone i’m not use to be.

I am mad at myself..
Of not giving full attention in the lecture..
Of not understand what i have learned..
That i am doing badly in my tutorials..
Yes, i am mad at myself..

I am mad at myself..
When people loss respect on me..
When people start ignoring me..
When i explained, they barely able to understand me..
That just made me a bad techer..a weak student-inside me..

I mad at myself..
That sometimes i regret of the offer to Russia..
And keep saying- that is the past. Forget it!
And I just need to move on by saying, this is where the reality is..
Which being a doctor is not a guarantee..
Oh...i am i  dilemma for things that i decided by my own feelings.

I mad of myself..
Of why i am keeping writing this and not study...
How ungrateful i am! For the all things He gave to me..
All these unease feeling, only His word could comfort me..
“Ya Allah, do give me strength to face and through all this..with succeed”

*result of being mad...

Friday, 16 December 2011

it's been a while...

it's been a while,
for me of not updating this blog...
and to be exact, i've been here for almost a half year.
i gain many new things..
new friends, new lesson, new experience, and not to say new shoes and cloths (i recently shopped..)
but a NO, NO of new boyfriend..i mean, the special one..

it's been a while,
for me not to back home..
i miss them so much that i couldn't describe it..
but, it's for my own achieve what i want in the future..

it's been a while,
for me to teach myself that 'sometimes you have to surrender for others for both goodness'
yes, i learn that a lot here..

this is quite boring..i know it. because.. i't's been a while!
*blame me.....................................................................